As a baby, I kept failing my hearing tests, so had to be taken to a big hearing centre with specialist equipment. The expert delivered their diagnosis to my Mum, “We know she can hear because she moves her eyes in the direction of the noise, but she needs to turn her head to pass the test, you just have a very wilful little girl”. Haha.
will·ful adjective ˈwil-fəl
: refusing to change your ideas or opinions or to stop doing something
: done deliberately
Merriam Webster dictionary
It seems I did grow with a wilful streak, this could easily be seen as a negative character trait, but it has actually served me well. It especially did so in the most painful season of my life. Besides, I prefer to think of this wilfulness as a description of my resolve!
1re·solve verb ri-ˈzälv, -ˈzȯlv also -ˈzäv or -ˈzȯv
: to make a definite and serious decision to do something
My marriage broke down on a Saturday. The following day was Sunday, so my legendary Mum volunteered to stay home and look after me whilst the rest of my family went to Church. There was only one problem – I had no intention of missing Church, I knew where I needed to be. So
wilful me I resolved to be there.
It was a guest speaker that day, I don’t remember what he was preaching on, but I remember exactly what God spoke to me through him – “Cling on!” As soon as the words left the preachers mouth, tears were streaming down my face; that word was for me.
The next two preaches, the same word was confirmed to me via two different preachers, “Cling on with everything you’ve got!” and “Cling on!”
Why did God say it three times? I believe it’s because He knows me and knew I’d doubt whether He was really speaking to me. In addition, there was a battle going on, not just for my marriage, but my heart and my mind too.
There’s a number of ways I clung to God, in this post I’ll talk about two of them. God willing, the others will be covered in future posts!
Cling to your faith in Christ
The enemy, not just satisfied with our dead marriage, and my prodigal spouse, he seemed to want to destroy my faith and me too. There was only one problem – he picked the wrong woman!
Cling tightly to your faith in Christ and always keep your conscience clear, doing what you know is right. For some people have disobeyed their consciences and have deliberately done what they knew was wrong. It isn’t surprising that soon they lost their faith in Christ after defying God like that.
This verse really speaks for itself:
- Cling tightly to your faith in Christ
- and always keep your conscience clear, doing what you know is right.
- some people have disobeyed their consciences and have deliberately done what they knew was wrong. It isn’t surprising that soon they lost their faith in Christ after defying God like that.
Choose to praise and worship God
Choosing to praise and worship became my default setting when things are rubbish long before our marriage broke down.
I implore you, if you’ve not already sorted your default setting, don’t wait for the troubled times to come before deciding what your response is going to be.
The world looks to offer much to assist in these times – alcohol, drugs, revenge, harm to name a few, but their effects temporary and harmful. None offer the lasting peace and relief that comes from being in the presence of God.
“Cling on with everything you’ve got!” That one came as things were getting worse, and I felt I didn’t have a lot in me, that was ok that, I just had to cling on with everything I had and He would do the rest:
I’ve picked you. I haven’t dropped you.’
Don’t panic. I’m with you.
There’s no need to fear for I’m your God.
I’ll give you strength. I’ll help you.
I’ll hold you steady, keep a firm grip on you
He does exactly what He says He will!